The Yellow Orb of Positivity

Who else has a complete shift in mood the second the sun is shining? 🌞  I know I do and I have always been hugely affected by the weather. The second there is a sniff of spring in the air, it changes everything. It's always a sign of 'better days to come' for me.

As soon as I saw the weather was good this past week, I felt a pang of jealousy that I would be sleeping throughout the sunny days due to working nights. Whilst I'm talking about work, I'll give you a little update on my working life..... being a newly qualified midwife is so hard! I feel so overwhelmed most of the time and I was petrified of being on the delivery suite where I currently am based. However, I'm surprisingly enjoying it and I think once I feel more competent in areas of the care I am giving, I will actually like being on the delivery suite. Plus the team I'm working with are just amazing!

As soon as I finished nights on Friday morning, I had a couple of hours sleep and then waited to pick Noah up from school. The weather was still amazing at 3:20 and I just wanted a normal afternoon, doing normal things because it feels like forever ago since I've done anything normal. So we went to Riverside Country Park, got an ice cream and sweets and sat with the sunshine beaming onto our faces. It felt amazing and even Noah said he really enjoyed it. 

So, how else is the rest of my life going? Well, it's going 😂  That's all I can say about things at the moment to be honest. I have lots of things going around my mind often, but my life motto now is "things can only get better' (anyone who remembers the 90's can burst into a rendition of D-Ream if you'd care to).

I'm trying my hardest to get myself exercising and moving as much as possible, so that I can feel even better about myself than I already do. One of the midwives at work is a yoga instructor and offers a yoga class to us on a Sunday morning, so I have started doing that especially on the weekends I don't have Noah. Those weekends are still the hardest time for me and it is so important I keep myself busy, something which will become easier once lockdown lifts a little.

Again, the sunshine has given me hope for things to look forward to once lockdown lifts. Pretty much everyone of my friendship groups have messaged me to say let's arrange something for when we can see each other. So if it's not sitting around my chiminea in the garden with Bex and Amanda eating pizza, it's being in Keeley's garden having a garage brunch reunion or trying to arrange how a group of us can get out to Kel's place in Marbella later this summer for a long weekend.

I'll be honest, as the weather warms up, I'm gutted that our last hot holiday as a family was summer 2018 and that we will never do all the things we loved doing whilst on holiday together again. The early evening walks to the beach, exploring different routes, stopping for coffee whilst others would be stopping for cocktails, planning days out and laughing so much. Ohhh we had so many more holidays planned together......... sigh 😔  But I shall make new holidays with Noah that are different to before but will become our thing. I just have to pluck up the courage to book something for just us two and know that I can do it on my own.

So with a week off work booked in August, who knows if I will muster up the gumption to take Noah away somewhere on my own? Maybe I should start with somewhere in the U.K first before I feel brave enough to go abroad?

I hope you've all been able to feel the warmth of the sun at some point this past week and that along with the end of lockdown news, you all feel a sense of positivity and hope for the coming year.

We sure as hell all deserve it!

Sara xx