Friday, 19 April 2013

Lots to tell.....

I haven't posted for what feels like forever so thought it was about time I updated you all on everything that has been happening.

I'm trying to think back to what last happened, which isn't hard to remember as I'm sure it included One Direction..... hmmmm mmmm mmmm!

Two months has passed since then, unbelievably, and I feel like lots has happened yet I'm struggling to remember now to tell you all.

Most importantly we've booked our wedding!!!!!!! So so excited! I've been told to "not go on about it too much", "don't splash it all over facebook", "we've got 2 years to wait", "it's going to cost a fortune"........ the list goes on, but nobody is stopping me from shouting it from the roof-tops! My main excitement goes to the fact that I thought I was going to be an old bride, wearing a suit instead of a dress, which now is not going to be the case! Secondly the venue we have booked was closed down a month ago, right when we were ready to book it. We started looking elsewhere and then heard it was back open, so arranged another viewing with the mums & Tony said lets just book it now. 

The countdown to July 2015 begins! I've today asked my bridesmaids if they would do me the duty of being my bridesmaids, which they have all agreed! So I have 4 bridesmaids and Noah will be my little man in a suit. Colour scheme is chosen, toastmaster is booked, photographers are in the pipeline...... I think it shows I have been waiting for this for too long!

Now, what else has happened. My longest bestest friend in the whole world (apart from my sister) has had a baby and joined the yummy mummy club. The whole day that I knew she had given birth, I think I was close to tears at any moment. Totes emosh describes how I was. I don't know why either. I think maybe its because she's the closest person to me so far that has had a baby since the traumatic birth I had. I think worry just takes over my mind in case anything goes wrong along with bringing back bad memories for me. This is when my mind goes crazy because all I want is to be happy for other people, which I am, but never in the way I would have been before. It's almost as though my happiness has been tainted forever, which is a very sad thing indeed.
Anyway, my friends little girl is the most gorgeous little baby. An absolute dot, so tiny! I really wish them all the best and hope they enjoy every moment of parenthood as it truly is magical.

I've been feeling a little up and down myself lately, although this last week we've been off work on annual leave and really treated it as a holiday. We were going to book a holiday abroad but then decided all our money needed to be saved if we were going to book a wedding as we have. This week has really helped me though in myself. I'd got to a point where I was having chest pains, which the doctor thinks is anxiety. I've been prescribed some tablets which if I'm honest I don't like taking as they make me feel drowsy, but they have helped. I think I was just ready for a week away from work at home with my boys.

We've visted lots of places including Leeds Castle, which although is a little pricey to get into (£21 per adult), is a fab day out with a ticket which is an annual pass for entry. Amazing lawns, with the boat ride and maze to conquer. I can't wait for the sun to be out so that we can really make the most of that ticket!

The diet has officially been off this week! We have eaten out every day! It's been lovely though and have just had our last meal out at the The Robin Hood pub on Blue Bell Hill. Absolutely amazing food for a good price too. I say that was our last meal out of the week, but I think we are eating out in London tomorrow night with some of Tony's friends! Oopsie, ok then if we must!

I am now refreshed though, still not wanting to return to work on Monday, but feeling a lot better than I did. I'm still waiting for this winfall I am expecting from the lottery I do not play! Fingers crossed something happens one day that means I can afford to be at home more with Noah, but at the moment I will continue to live for the weekends.

Oh, I almost forgot, me and Tony are on this tv programme about couples at the moment. It only started last night and luckily we weren't in the first 2 episodes but I'm sure we will be from next week. There is only one thing I can say about it................ cringe!!!

I have been forbidden from saying when it is on etc by Tony, but we are now starring in the advert, so no doubt more people will see it. Never again will I let that boy talk me into something, although everyone deserves their 5 minutes of fame. I've got a feeling ours is a little more than 5 minutes, but you get the jist. If you do see it, please turn over and save me the embarrassment of knowing you have seen the awfulness of me and Tony baring all!