I've been waiting for this to happen, but I never thought it would be so soon to be honest or the reason it has happened, to be the reason why!
I apologise if some of this doesn't read right but I feel slightly high as a kite still from the medication I was prescribed 3 days ago.
This is where things have changed for me. I went to the doctors on Monday evening and explained how I still felt no better and was really struggling sleeping. The doctor wasn't my usual doctor but he listened and said that he was going to change my medication. The new tablets would help with sleeping also.
I couldn't take one of these new ones until Tuesday evening, so I looked forward to waking up Wednesday feeling recharged and refreshed. I had Wednesday all planned out. I was taking Noah to nursery, heading up to see my friend Noemi, we were going to hit the gym and I was going to help her decorate her Christmas tree.
Firstly I woke up at 10:30am with Noah next to me in bed. I don't even recall Tony getting up and going to work. I then got up and immediately realised I felt soooooo incoherent! I felt absolutely smashed!!! I knew straight away I couldn't drive and cancelled all plans for the day. I sat Noah in front of the tv and I slept, slept and slept all the hours I could. Tony came home at 5:20 and I went to bed.
Now, I wasn't keen on taking another of these tablets, but Tony said that maybe I needed to get them in my system. So I took another and was soundo for the night.
I woke up today and yet again feel absolutely out of it. I've not been asleep all day but I feel drunk, theres no other way to describe it. Its awful. I can't focus, can't trust myself to look after Noah and feel unable to make any decisions with this foggy head.
The fact that Tony has been calling me Kerry Katona for the past 2 days from her infamous "This Morning' interview really has given me the kick i've needed. I can't explain what has happened to me but I feel that if I don't sort myself out, then this is all that awaits me. A life of numbness, drugs and a lonely existence, which I really don't want.
These tablets have almost made me think I need to come off them altogether. I don't want a life where medication rules me and I need to nip it in the bud now!
So my plan is, stop taking these ridiculous comatising type meds, throw myself back into my exercising and get myself back to normal. My exercising really will help and I've now realised how much I need it.
This is it, no more dribbling and rocking in a corner (which is what I have done the last 2 days) and back to health and fitness!!
Come on Sara, you can do this!!!!!!!! My aim is my work Christmas do! I want to go, I will go! Friday 19th December, Mumu, Maidstone........... I've got to be there!!! xxx
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